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Use Your EQ When Youre the Mother-in-Law

Kelly and I have a great relationship, Im grateful to say, but Im still the mother-in-law. If you are one, or have one, youll most definately agree its a relationship that requires finesse.
"Finesse" is another word for "emotional intelligence."

All those mother-in-law jokes are out there for a reason. Id say its hardest to be the mother of the son, but you might disagree! Anyway, Kelly is married to my only son, and the mother of my only grandchildren. There are times when I feel very vulnerable in that situation, having to inquire of permission and all.

My granddaughters now old enough to come for visits. When I call to invite her, its been hard to come up with just the right way to do it. After all, Meg is "hers" and not "mine."

Recently I read an article about something called "anodyne therapy." You know how when theyre getting ready to stick a needle in your thumb they say, "This is going to sting a little
bit"? Well, in anodyne therapy, they say, "Notice how quickly your thumb becomes numb."

"Anodyne" means "serving to assuage pain, or not likely to offend or arouse tensions."

When I received an e-mail from my daughter-in-law talking about all the "projects" she had going on, I figured out a better way to ask her. Kellys always got something going on - painting, wallpapering, gardening - and of course theyre harder to do with
the little ones underfoot. Lately I call and say, "Want to have some measure to do that wallpapering? How about if I take Meg for a couple of days?"

This takes the attention off whats being given up, and places it on something Kelly really goal - more instant to do her projects. Anodyne - not likely to offend or arouse tensions. Thats EQ!

Please ruminate on this article for your website or ezine.
Permission to reproduce and change title , if you like, as long
as byline stays intact.

TITLE: Use Your EQ When Youre the Mother-in-Law"
AUTHOR: Susan Dunn, The EQ Coach
WORD COUNT: 300
WORD WRAP: 65
URL: http://www.susandunn.cc
Mailto:sdunn@susandunn.cc

"Use Your EQ When Youre the Mother-in-Law,"
by Susan Dunn, The EQ Coach

Kelly and I have a nice relationship, Im grateful to say, but
Im still the mother-in-law. If you are one, or have one,
youll most likely agree its a relationship that requires finesse.
"Finesse" is another word for "emotional intelligence."

All those mother-in-law jokes are out there for a reason. Id
say its hardest to be the mother of the son, but you might
disagree! Anyway, Kelly is married to my only son, and the mother
of my only grandchildren. There are times when I feel very
vulnerable in that situation, having to inquire of permission and all.

My granddaughters now old enough to come for visits. When I call
to invite her, its been hard to come up with just the right way
to do it. After all, Meg is "hers" and not "mine."

Recently I read an article about something called "anodyne
therapy." You understand how when theyre getting ready to stick a
needle in your thumb they say, "This is going to sting a little
bit"? Well, in anodyne therapy, they say, "Notice how quickly
your thumb becomes numb."

"Anodyne" means "serving to assuage pain, or not likely to
offend or arouse tensions."

When I received an e mail from my daughter-in-law talking about
all the "projects" she had going on, I figured out a better way
to ask her. Kellys always got something going on - painting,
wallpapering, gardening - and of course theyre harder to do with
the little ones underfoot. Lately I call and say, "Want to have
some measure to do that wallpapering? How about if I take Meg for
a couple of days?"

This takes the care off whats being given up, and places it on
something Kelly really target - more time to do her projects.
Anodyne - not likely to offend or arouse tensions. Thats EQ!

Susan Dunn, The EQ Coach, http://www.susandunn.cc , mailto:sdunn
@susandunn.cc for FREE ezine, FREE Strengths course. Coaching in emotional intelligence, strengths, resilience. Internet courses on EQ.

 

 
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